Benefits of Setting Healthy Personal Boundaries

For some individuals it can be challenging to set and maintain healthy personal boundaries.  Our first lessons on boundary setting are learned in childhood through our experiences within our family of origin.  We learn what boundaries are acceptable by which ones are modeled and reinforced.  These may or may not have worked well to protect us while still supporting our relationships and connections to others.  A review of the boundaries you’re currently enforcing may indicate that making some changes are in your best interest.


boundary setting


Boundary setting is a skill that is learned and, therefore, it can be developed and/or refined at any time.  If you find yourself feeling emotionally drained, unsafe, unappreciated, or overwhelmed, you may need to set stronger boundaries within a specific relationship, work place, or in general.  Here are some examples:

  • You have a friend who uses you as their go-to problem solver and refuses to take responsibility for their own actions.  They have a lot of wonderful qualities and you want to maintain your friendship with them but, you feel increasingly resentful each time they call.  It’s in your best interest to sit them down and gently but firmly set new boundaries for your relationship.
  • You have an “ex” that continues to call under the slightest pretext, making it difficult, if not impossible, for you to move on with your life.  It’s time to take a tougher stance.  It might come down to refusing to take their phone calls
  • A co-worker frequently dumps job tasks on you because you’re diligent about getting your work done efficiently and without procrastination.  You hate conflict so you’ve been picking up the slack, but now, you’ve been suffering from tension headaches and dread going to work.  Starting to say “no” may be the most expedient “cure” to your workplace ailments.


boundary setting



The thought of making someone else angry or upset with you may be uncomfortable or even scary, but the benefits are worth it!


How does having healthy boundaries make your life better?  Below is a partial list of benefits:

  1. Your life will be less stressful, cluttered, and distracted.
  2. You’ll experience a new sense of calmness and direction.
  3. The people who truly care about you will adjust to your new boundaries.
  4. Over time, you will get better at setting and maintaining boundaries that feel good to you. (As I mentioned earlier, boundary setting is a skill and can be improved upon.)
  5. You’ll make more room in your life for the people who appreciate you and enrich your life.
  6. You’ll start attracting others who have healthy boundaries into your life.
  7. You’ll be able to focus on enhancing your life rather than repairing it or just surviving each day.
  8. You’ll have more energy to pursue your dreams and your life purpose.
  9. You’ll feel more hopeful and enthusiastic about your life and your future.
  10. You’ll feel more in control of your life’s trajectory and equipped to make good decisions.
  11. You’ll respond immediately and assertively to boundary violations without feeling guilty.
  12. You’ll be more respectful of other people’s boundaries.

In short, you will be empowering yourself and others, you’ll have more satisfying relationships, and you’ll feel freer to take risks because you’ll know from experience that you can protect yourself.

Stephanie Eissinger is a LCPC, a CPC, a Embody Love Movement Facilitator, and a Self Help Book Author who’s spent her professional life empowering individuals to overcome life’s challenges to live happier, healthier lives.  Her self help books include: The Stress Management 2.0 Series; Divorce Recovery: How To Clean Out Your “Inner Closet;” How To Get An “Emotional Divorce” & Speed Up Your Relationship Recovery; Fitness Goal Triad: How to Successfully Reach Your Fitness Goals.


Self Help Book: Journey to Self Empowerment: Increase Self Esteem & Self Confidence




Journey To Self Empowerment: Increase Self Esteem & Self Confidence is a great resource to building a life that is based on setting healthy boundaries, learning new skills, and building self esteem and confidence to live life on your terms.






Related Page/Posts:

Living Without Boundaries is Dangerous…

Setting & Enforcing Boundaries is Self Empowerment in Action

Personal Boundaries Quiz – Discover the Type of Boundaries You’re Enforcing

Self Respect is a Cornerstone For Living an Empowered Life

Book Resource: Journey To Self Empowerment: Increase Self Esteem & Self Confidence

Life Fitness Dimensions: Balancing Your Life



Sign up for My Free Newsletter


wellness & recovery coaching, disordered eating recovery coaching2016 ©